I’m that yelling mom…

Ari knows exactly how to push my buttons!!! She took my phone and put it outside the door just like that. It was such a blink of the moment situation one minute its on the couch and the next thing I don’t see it at all. I asked Hubby if he had seen it and his answer was no. I was frustrated because I couldn’t get an answer from the blabbing- baby-talking Ari so I just walked around the house randomly looking and mostly following Ari’s every move. Lo and behold I found it outside. Ari must have decided she would rather have the phone lying on the ground just outside the kitchen door.

Ari doing her exploring the marshmallows

I scream at Ari because that is what she responds to? Ari understands what is wrong and what is right so she has started a sneaking routine or being naughty in secret routine. She was super quiet for some time and when I got to the kitchen she had emptied the box of cereal and moved on to a bag of marshmallows which she had scattered around her. The funny part was that she had managed to do the sticky gooeiness with the marshmallows. When I spoke to her telling her to pack the marshmallows back in the packet (yes it was a new packet so we pack them back in) she looked at me and went back to her playing. If I raise my voice just a decibel she responds and stops whatever wrong act she was or is doing. This is what works for us at the moment…

How do I stop my child from her naughty deeds? Ari likes to spill her juice, bottle or her food, for some reason they all look better or probably taste better from the floor. So I would tell her to stop in a calm voice when I see her do it. My AriBear is such determined little thing she will walk away from my site of view and do exactly what I told her not to do, only she will do it “without Mommy seeing her” in her mind that is. This child will hide with the wall or just have her back to me and with her 21 – month old reasoning no one is looking! She will have a little shock when she sees she has been caught but then she will carry-on spreading the food all over the place making a mess. My strategy of reprimanding her is:

  1. Call her name, squint my eyes in that ‘you better stop right now’ way.
  2. Tell her to stop in a very calm stern voice
  3. Tell her she must stop for the second time because I won’t repeat myself, still in a calm voice
  4. Breath and tell myself I am doing great…

It gives me great pleasure to tell you none of these have helped me so far with Ari, if you have been following the blog you know she explores and destructs (previous insert) all the time. She ignores me, throws the bowl/bottle at me for trying to stop her or the one she does so well, she turns her head and her whole body away from me and continues with whatever she was busy with. Yes, I get dismissed! Raising my voice just a little bit, dare I say yelling, which is working for me at the moment and we are happy to stick to this strategy. With the promise of revisiting other methods in time.

Ari with her snack and happy as always

The depths of the naughty acts…I think these little buggers know exactly what is right and wrong but decide they will do what they want despite all of that. We were at the ATM standing in a long tiring line when this child decided she wants to pull my dress up. It was such an unexpected moment I was trying to pull her away and to pull the dress out of her grip all at the same time but she just got under my dress and covered herself – shock does not even begin to explain how I felt. Ari had never done this before which is why I was in utter shock but she pulled off the whole act like a pro and I am pretty sure I flashed a couple of people!

Am I wrong to yell at my girl? Ari is 21 months old and the act of trying to reason with her is something I yearn for especially when she is busy turning the house upside down and driving me insane. Am I wrong to yell at her to stop trying to stick her head in the freezer or trying to fiddle with the electric cables, well I probably am because no one wants to be screamed at? My failed attempts at saying, “No Ari”, or “Stop it” is met with a giggle, a smile and a continuance of whatever it is. The laughs and giggles are those that say, “you caught me, Mommy, just hang on I want to continue just for a little bit more with my silliness. I will be working on these 10 ways to stop yelling, although I think Ari needs to grow just a bit for her to understand certain things.

Have a look at this great article that gives good insight on how to deal with toddlers and discipline strategies. When raising kids any help is great and any advice could be the right one.

Love Ari’s Mommy…